


Goodbye

by lawdawg95



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-15
Updated: 2014-10-15
Packaged: 2018-02-21 08:04:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,669
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2460920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lawdawg95/pseuds/lawdawg95
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>****SPOILER 3.01*******</p>
<p>Felicity says goodbye.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Goodbye

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanfiction. I wrote it in a hurry before tonight's episode so it still makes sense. I did not have long to proof read. All errors are mine.

Felicity was sitting in the second row behind the Lance family. Quinten, Dinah and Laurel all looked shell shocked. Even from behind them she could tell they were so overwhelmed with sadness. They were present here at the funeral but they looked like they could not believe why they were here. They spent six years thinking their daughter was dead. They get her back for a little over a year, and have to endure the pain of losing her again. This time there will be no come back. This time Sara is gone forever leaving behind as much heartache as the first time they lost her.

Nyssa stood at the back of the room. She was invited to sit with the family, but she decided to stand in the back. She loved Sara. No one was really sure how long Sarah and Nyssa were together because the details of Sara’s time away were somewhat sketchy. Their love and ability to make one another happy, those were unquestioned. Nyssa was a private person and did not want to showcase her grief on the front row with Sara’s family.

Oliver and Dig flanked Felicity. They were both taking up defensive positions as if there was anything they could do which would protect Felicity from the pain she was experiencing. Next to Dig was Roy and then Sin. Team Arrow had lost its first member and those that remained were grief stricken. Sara was murdered. She was taken from them. While her killer would be brought to justice, it would not bring Sara back.

Felicity stood and walked to the front of the church. Captain Lance had asked her to say a few words at Sara’s service. She had to walk by Sara’s coffin and she reached out to touch it as she did so. She needed to find her strength because she had to get through this for all of them.

“My name is Felicity Smoak. Sara was my friend. I didn’t know her as long as some of you, but I had come to love Sara as my sister. There are so many things I am going to miss about Sara, but most of all will be our talks. Some in person, some by email or text. Well maybe it is unfair to say we talked, it was a lot of me rambling and Sara listening. But I know she always listened. She would offer the best insight and comments. Whenever Sara would share a story with me, I knew it was a good day. Lately it seemed like we were having more of those. She was so smart and she had a wicked sense of humor. I am really going to miss Sara. It has been said that ‘Death ends a life, it does not end a relationship.’ I am taking comfort in the fact that my friendship with Sara will survive her death. I am still her friend and she is still mine. I will continue to talk to her, I just have to wait a little longer to find out her response.”

Felicity looked to Oliver, who sat with a near blank expression on his face. Felicity knew he was heartbroken. He was trying so hard to be emotionless, but she knew him too well. His eyes could not contain his sadness. Dig was also trying to remain strong. His face was trying to convey to Felicity his support, but she could tell he was hurting too. Maybe because he hadn’t been at the vigilante business as long Roy was having a harder time concealing his emotions. Roy had red rimmed eyes and had clearly been crying. Right now he was doing his best to support Sin who was a mess. Sin and Sara had a special relationship and she was taking Sara’s death the hardest. Sara had been Sin’s family and Felicity was going to try and step up because Sara would like that. Felicity could feel the strength that Oliver, Dig, and Roy were trying to send her from their seats. Her team would always be there for her, but they were all hurting right now.

“A couple of months ago Sara had come to town for a quick visit with Nyssa. They were just passing through and I offered my guest room for the night. After they had dinner with Laurel and Captain Lance they came back to my place. Sin came over to hang out with us too. As was often the case when we got together, we decided to share a bottle of wine or three. Our conversations often got much deeper the more we drank. The walls come down and the tongues get loose. Although for those of you who know me, you know that babbling seems to be my go to means of communication. It was in these moments that Sara would talk more.” Dig, Roy, and Oliver all smiled.

“That night the conversation turned to our regrets. Sara told me that her biggest regret in life is that she hurt the people who she loved the most. Specifically she thought of her family, Captain Lance and Dr. Lance. You both know she would come to town and not let you know because she didn’t have time to visit. She just had enough time to fall asleep and then she was on the road again. She felt guilty for not spending more time with you. She felt like she was gone so much and you deserved more of her time. She regretted her time away from you. She loved you both so much. She told me how you both were the best parents. Stories of family meals and games played around the kitchen table. I was not blessed with great parents. Sara would frequently tell me how lucky she was in that regard. She wasn’t bragging, she was aware of how awesome her parents were, even if she didn’t tell you as often as she should have. She regretted not spending more time with you and letting you know how much she appreciated and loved you. 

“Laurel…“ Felicity’s voice hitched as she looked to Laurel who now had tears streaming down her cheeks. The two women had become somewhat friendly in the months since they had both been held prisoners of Slade Wilson. The tears Felicity had been trying to hold back now also spilled from her eyes. Oliver went to get up to comfort Felicity, but she put her hand up. Oliver sat back down.

“Laurel, Sara loved you so, so much. You were her big sister. She told me so many stories about how she would follow you around when you guys were little. She envied you. She made some really bad choices when she got a little older. She regretted those choices, not for what they cost her personally, but because of the pain she caused you. She got lost for a little while, but she found her way again. Sara was so happy that you had reconciled. You gave her back her confidence and willingness to love herself again. You are the reason she came back to Starling City. She was so proud of you and everything that you do to try and help others. She told me more than once that you were a hero.

“Nyssa, I am not going to tell you Sara’s regrets. You were there that night. But I want you to know you made my friend so very happy. Thank you for loving her. You started healing her so she could come back to her family. Because of you, I got to meet Sara and become her friend. Therefore you indirectly changed my life for the better and I will be forever indebted to you for that.  
Felicity paused and looked at Oliver, Dig, and Roy. She couldn’t, at this time and in front of this audience, tell them what each of them had meant to Sara. It was like so many other things with Team Arrow, they could communicate without words. Her glistening eyes told each of them what they needed to know. Sara loved them as much as they loved her. She was a comrade, a member of their team, and without her they would not be the same. Felicity closed her eyes a little longer and regained her composure.

“I am sorry. That night I made Sara a promise which I had no idea I would need to fulfill so soon. When Sara asked me my regrets, I decided to attempt humor. While I like to talk, I don’t like to talk about myself and didn’t want to discuss something real.” Felicity looked at Oliver. His eyes meeting hers and acknowledging what he knew her regret, perhaps more now than ever. “I told her that I regretted going to MIT and not pursuing a career as a professional singer. Sara thought that was hysterical. She would not stop laughing. She told me that she always wanted to be a dancer. She then demanded that I sing her a song. We spent the night singing and dancing all of us. We laughed so hard.” Felicity paused remembering the details of that night. Looking to Nyssa and Sin, who also had tears were streaming down their cheeks at the memory.

“I cannot remember when I had had so much fun. Sara made me promise that night that I would sing at her ….” She let out a strangled sob. “at her funeral and remember that night. Sara made me promise to sing at her funeral. I agreed and made her promise to dance at my funeral in exchange. I had no idea that I would have to honor my promise in a couple of months. I had kind of hoped we would both die old ladies many many years from now.”

Felicity looked to the Lances in the front row “Sara also made me promise to look out for her family when she was gone. Not that she was thinking about her death, but she wanted me to look out for each of you when she could not be here to do it herself. Sara, I promise that I will always keep watch.” Captain Lance had a tear escape down his cheek and Dr. Lance wiped at the tears freely flowing. Laurel gave her a nod, knowing what Felicity meant when she said she would keep watch. It meant as a member of Team Arrow she would look over all the Lances and Laurel appreciated the sentiment.

Felicity now looked to Oliver and he had tears in his eyes. “Oliver, Sara also made me promise some things in relation to you. She made me promise to help you remember to look for the light. After what you both had gone through, Sara knew how lonely the darkness could be, and she did not want that for you. Sara wanted you to try and find happiness because she knew you deserved it. Sara, I will remember.” Oliver closed his eyes and when he opened them the tears fell from his eyes. 

“I have never broken a promise to Sara and I do not intend to start today. Our friend Roy has agreed to help me with Sara’s song. I am going to apologize now because I don’t actually think I could ever get a job as a professional singer, but, and I blame the wine, Sara loved this song.” Roy got up and grabbed a guitar which had been sitting off to the side. He sat on the stool behind Felicity and began to play. Felicity sang the most beautiful rendition of “Fire and Rain” by James Taylor

Just yesterday mornin', they let me know you were gone  
Sara the plans they made put an end to you  
I walked out this morning and I wrote down this song  
I just can't remember who to send it to

I've seen fire and I've seen rain  
I've seen sunny days that I thought would never end  
I've seen lonely times when I could not find a friend  
But I always thought that I'd see you again

Won't you look down upon me, Jesus   
You've got to help me make a stand  
You've just got to see me through another day  
My body's aching and my time is at hand  
I won't make it any other way

I've seen fire and I've seen rain  
I've seen sunny days that I thought would never end  
I've seen lonely times when I could not find a friend  
But I always thought that I'd see you again

Been walking my mind to an easy time, my back turned towards the sun  
Lord knows when the cold wind blows, it'll turn your head around  
Well there's hours of time on the telephone line to talk about things to come  
Sweet dreams and flying machines in pieces on the ground

I've seen fire and I've seen rain  
I've seen sunny days that I thought would never end  
I've seen lonely times when I could not find a friend  
But I always thought that I'd see you, one more time again, now

Thought I'd see you one more time again  
There's just a few things coming my way this time around now  
Thought I'd see you, thought I'd see you, fire and rain now

I've seen fire and I've seen rain  
I've seen sunny days that I thought would never end  
I've seen lonely times when I could not find a friend  
But I always thought that I'd see you, one more time again, now

Thought I'd see you one more time again  
There's just a few things coming my way this time around now  
Thought I'd see you, thought I'd see you, fire and rain now

 

Felicity stood there in silence when the song was complete. There was not a dry eye in the entire church. Roy put the guitar down and Felicity reached for him as he walked by. She buried her face in his shirt and lost control. Roy wrapped his arms around his friend. She sobbed. Her heart was broken. She had held it together for as long as she could and she just didn’t have it in her anymore. Oliver and Dig both stood up, but Captain Lance jumped from his seat and he wrapped his arms around Felicity. He held her as they both cried. He whispered words of encouragement. He told Felicity how beautiful her song was and how much Sara would have loved her song. 

“I know this is stupid but I don’t want to sit down because then it means that this is closer to being over. That it is real. That I have to move on, and I don’t want to move on. I want Sara back. I don’t want to say goodbye to someone else when I have no choice.” Felicity admitted her fear.

Oliver approached Captain Lance and Felicity and she immediately clung to him. He whispered so only she could hear him “We need to sit Felicity. I don’t want to move on either. I don’t want to say goodbye to her again. It is not fair, but it is what we have to do.” He walked her back to her seat and held her hand for the remainder of the service. When they sat down, Dig grabbed her other hand and Roy reached over and touched her shoulder.

Felicity hated saying goodbye. She had enough loss in her life. She always told Oliver that she knew and accepted the risks of the life they chose to lead. She knew that Sara did too. It didn’t mean that it wasn’t painful, but she was not alone Felicity was certain together she, Oliver, Dig and Roy would all get through the most devastating thing to happen to their team. They will become stronger and they will continue their mission while they remember Sara. You honor the dead by fighting and they were not done fighting for Starling City.


End file.
